Martin Luther King Jr. once said: “We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope.” Taken alone, they’re pretty words. They sound good and are inspirational at their face.
I think the real power of a quote like that is found through deeper investigation. Specifically, because they were spoken by the leader of the modern civil rights movement. They gain a great deal of additional weight when placed in the context of a life spent fighting to make the world better.
It’s easy to offer statements about remaining hopeful from an easy or comfortable place in life. It is far more difficult to do so when facing seemingly insurmountable odds or after suffering a humiliating defeat. Hope is a very powerful element of success that is often overlooked.
Last weekend, I finished reading a book on the scientific study of ‘grit’ that has taken place over the last few decades. ‘Grit’ is the quality in some people that enables them to continue to work tirelessly toward a goal, despite setbacks and stumbles.
Research has revealed a great deal about grit, one element of which is a sense of hope. Hope is the expectation of success or that things will get better. A child who doesn’t believe they will ever learn to play piano, will not try as hard and will likely give up sooner than a child who believes that they will learn.
Hope doesn’t mean we don’t practice or train or sacrifice or suffer. Rather, hope is the oil that lubricates the process for us. When we lose a game or stumble in competition or fall short of a goal, the ability to see a future where we are successful makes it possible to get up and try harder tomorrow.
It’s important to note that hope by itself isn’t enough. I knew a young man who failed out of school because of his unwillingness to attend classes or do any work. He often expressed his goal: to become a lawyer. He genuinely believed it would one day happen.
I have no doubt he was capable of it, but his hope for a successful future was undercut by his total unwillingness to work at all. Hope is powerful, when paired with drive and willingness to work. Without those elements, hope is basically daydreaming.
Though hope is a vital thing, enduring hope is not a naturally occurring personality trait. It’s easy to become discouraged or to lose hope. Some folks are naturally gifted when it comes to optimism, but for most people, it takes work.
There are several simple ways to encourage hope in yourself. The first is to set goals, both large and small. Setting a lofty inspiring goal is like setting out to be a concert pianist. It sounds great, and it might give you an emotional charge to keep you moving forward. However, it takes a lot of training and effort. In fact, it takes more training and effort than most people can muster based on the simple long-term goal.
This is where short-term goals come in. They are simply steps in the process and give us a sense of victory along the way. This would be like setting the goal to learn a song on the way to mastering piano. Little goals add up to big accomplishments over time.
Another important aspect of hope is surrounding yourself with folks who encourage you. This sounds easy, but it’s not quite as obvious as you’d expect. Statistically, folks are far more hopeful when they spend a lot of time with folks who are hopeful as well.
A final element is self-talk. The sorts of things we say to ourselves on a regular basis can either encourage or discourage us. Learning positive self-talk sometimes requires the aid of a counselor and can require daily effort. When combined with smart goals and an encouraging environment, it can keep hope alive long enough for you to accomplish great things.
