I’m sure everyone remembers parents and grandparents talking about " making do." I have used that expression also. Out of any beef, you might turn to using cans of tuna in a recipe. Sometimes that making do is due to not wanting to make another trip to the store, but it can also be because you can’t afford the beef right now. My mother made a great casserole with cans of mixed vegetables and a biscuit topping. I liked it as a child and didn’t realize she was " making do" till she could afford meat. My maternal grandmother was a wizard stretching meals to accommodate people who just dropped by at mealtime. Throw a few more potatoes in the pot, cut up the meat, and make gravy. Everyone has their tricks to " make do."
Men make do all the time when fixing things around the house or farm. Few things are thrown out as you never know when you might need them. You make do with those leftovers from other projects to accomplish new projects. I’m sure many women felt she was making do by quilting. She saved old fabrics and clothes that could no longer be worn and stitched them together to create a beautiful work of art that had the practical purpose also, of keeping you warm. Dolly Parton sings about her" Coat of Many Colors, "her mother sewed for her. They were dirt poor, but her mother" made do." Dolly needed a coat, and her mother stitched together a beautiful medley of colors that Dolly remembers even now.
Many people grew up poor with their family making do every day. Many of these families, however, were unaware of their negatives; instead, they focused on their positives.
I was reminded of this attitude the other day. My son, who lives in Vancouver, has a business and is a kind soul. He gives to large amounts of food banks, animal shelters, etc., every year. He lives in a very nice part of Vancouver where one does not expect crime. This May, he was attacked by a homeless man, and this person stabbed him and my son’s throat. A totally unprovoked attack in Chris’s yard. Thank God there were witnesses who tended to him and called an ambulance. Chris has been left with damage to his voice box, facial nerves, and muscles. He can’t really talk right now but has made signs to help him communicate. He has to eat a certain way due to nerve and muscle damage. He is told in a year; the specialists can better decide what can and can’t be done for him. Of course, he had surgery and was sent home to " make do ."He and I both have gone through a gamut of feelings. Grief, shock, anger, and depression, to name a few. Yesterday we were texting, and he said he was no longer "making do"; he was forging ahead to make his life the best possible. He told me that none of us end up living the life we might have predicted, and that’s ok. That he knew we were responsible for making ourselves happy was precisely what he would do. He lives two blocks from the ocean, and nature is his great healer. Every day he spends some time on the beach or riding his bike alongside. He takes a neighbor’s dog out for five-mile walks, and they end up in the ocean, rejoicing in life together. No one delights in life like a dog, and Chris has found this particular Golden Retriever, who, by the way, to be a great aid to his healing.
I see evidence around Big Sandy of people like you and me who are not living the life they might have envisioned, but their efforts to do better than "making do" cheer me every time I see them. I love the llama that peeks over bushes. He brings a smile to my face every time I see him (her?). On a different side of town, I enjoy a large papier mache cow( at least I think it is) standing proud and tall in its front yard. I love that cow. I’m very envious of that cow!!! I see a woman with a small yard with the brightest, most wonderful turquoise chair and table in her yard. Seeing them always lifts my spirits. When driving to feed my horses, I see a small yard with several dogs. Those dogs are always happily looking; now I see they have their own paddling pool!! What luxury!! Christmas came early! I know of a woman living in Canada, now widowed, in a sizeable drab Quonset that was a garage. In the summer, she always has a few large planters at the front filled with masses of colorful blooms. At Christmas, she has a few bright and colorful lights strung around. She is adding dashes of color to cheer up her living. I’m a great believer in the five things lifting us out of making do. One is nature in its many facets and, along with that color, and the added ingredient of friends. Music can also lift and transport us to the happy past or inject new energy into the present. Reading can take you to other times and places and give you something to look forward to. Something within which you can immerse yourself, forgetting your surroundings and everything but what is happening in your book. You can mix and match. Maybe you are lifted out of your "making do" just with nature. I, personally, like to combine everything possible. I make a grand mish-mash of many opportunities to lift myself out of just "making do."
Our world is full of gloom and doom, and when something like what happened to my son and me hits you unexpectedly, you are temporarily floored. You are down, and there seems to be no up. I’m so glad my son is wise enough to realize that each of us holds the key to happiness. Becoming happy can be complex. I like to mix life’s offerings in uncoordinated servings; each day gives me different reasons to lift myself out of "making do" with my life. Some days I throw some "happy" things together, and of course, some results are more successful than others. But don’t despair. You are the author of your story in many ways. Yes, things are always out of our control, but you always have the chance to turn your " making do" into the best possible life you can live in the here and now with all your negatives and positives. You can choose to make the best of all your opportunities.No matter how poor one might be, nature, color, music, and friends are available. Books are also a short walk away if you have a great library as we do. Now I have to find myself a papier mache cow, and life will be good! I can’t tell you how much I love that cow!
